1. I should be able to hand in outlines instead of papers.  ^ heg chcks russian nukes is pretty self explanatory…why do i need a paragraph to say it?
  2. I shouldn’t need to explicitly answer opposing points of view in papers…that’s just giving away free disads. Read the preemts section, foo!
  3. Coming up with a long list of reasons why something is true should discourage people from challenging my assumptions.
  4. Cap Bad should be an acceptable answer to any essay test. For example, Q: “How does Millet’s ‘The Gleaner’s’ compare and contrast with David’s “Oath of the Horatii’?” A: “Ummmm…you endorse capitalism.”
  5. Same goes for politix.
  6. Every class should relate to nuke war or environmental collapse.
  7. If the professor’s lecture or reading material doesn’t match syllabus, or if the syllabus isn’t specific enough, or if it’s too specific, I get to leave class.
  8. Grades should be as inflated as speaker points.
  9. Speech times are not optional, Professor Hull. I don’t flow after the timer goes off.
  10. My partner should clean up all my messes and do all my work. 😉